Start small, and keep it simple. If you don't have peace in your own heart, it is unlikely you will effect peace on a global scale.

Your own peace is important. To be able to think clearly, to function under any stress, you need to be able to call upon peace for yourself.

There are books, tapes, cds, counselors, all which can offer insights into attaining some modicum of peace. It is impossible to tell you which approach will be right for you. What is important, is that you look for your own path to peace. It doesn't have to involve being a yogi, or achieving a full lotus position. It could be as mundane (yet crucial) as being able to drive in heavy traffic with 3 other people in the car.

Your own peace is important. It is vital. It could mean your survival. It is important enough for you to look into it. The time to start is now.

October 5, 2008

I started thinking about my own propensity for violence. I have to admit I have a rather terrible temper, mostly of the screaming variety. I have made some strides in controlling it, partially for a very selfish reason; simply, I feel so bad after a spate of temper that it's painful.

Earlier today I was trying to recall if I had ever actually hit someone as in a fight - I don't think I was ever involved in a fistfight, I surely would have remembered it. I also don't recall doing much slapping, either. This doesn't mean I am a more peaceful person than anyone else, for I don't believe I am.

I know that while kidding around with friends, mostly male friends, I maybe punched or lightly slapped someone's arm, but I didn't make a habit of it. But, if I did or didn't, what does that mean? Agressiveness is possible in anyone - it's whether you act on it or not that can make the difference.

My attention turned recently to the relationship between bullying and war, and what, if any relationships connect the two. This means that I need to research bullying, and expand my research into war - for to make peace possible, you need to know what war really is.

I am still learning.

October 8, 2007

Today I did a rather counterintuitive thing, but I did it on purpose. I find that if I do this at least once a week, it helps me. Maybe it will help you too. I found that on days when I watch a lot of news and horror happening around the world, my own peace level goes way down as my stress level goes way up.

I laughingly call it 'chicks and bunnies'. I promise myself that as i scour the news and videos, I will purposely not look at any about war, killing, death, 911, financial news, wall street, the US Senate. Just for that ONE day.

If you have the means to get some rest from the world, do it. if you are in the midst of horror, this may not be helpful unless you are very good at meditation. That reminds me, I need to get back to meditation.

September 5 2007

Recently I made a tactical error and misjudged someone. In my ignorance, or rather, my not wanting to admit the truth, I almost started a rampage. Something i said in an email was taken in a different way than I intended, and that could have been disastrous.

So, I almost 'started a war.' What frightened me about it was how easy it was to do, without intending to.

I have tried to clarify what I said, to explain what I meant. I don't know if that had any impact.

The last thing I wanted was to raise a war. What I wanted to do was indicate I was concerned about someone I care about. How did this turn into a struggle?

It came from years of history, years of misunderstanding, years of my trying to communicate and being met with the occasional rolled eye, the chance askance look. I fully admit that I might be a crank, a complainer, a crackpot. I also state that for the most part, I hold my tongue. In this one instance, I couldn't, or felt I couldn't.

The truth that I now acknowledge, and work diligently to embrace, is that no matter what I feel, my opinions are not welcome. They are not to be expressed. They are to be held forever, deeply within me, and never, ever, to see the light of day again. For I am alone in how I feel on this one topic. This one topic that I tried to open up for discussion among the adults in my family is never to be opened again.

I must live in a new paradigm, change the paradigm under which I function. The accurate paradigm, unlike the former one, is that I am truly alone.

If there is to be peace in my family, and if I am to be one of the people who keeps that peace, then the new paradigm is the only way.